I don’t mind the noise. And I don’t mind the long hours. The mess, the laundry, the dirt, the repetition: they all seem just par for the course to me. The fact is I love the glorious cacophony of motherhood.
But there are days and there are moments in those days that sweep over me with tsunami crests. Days when I have to steel my nerve as I think to myself I just don’t think I’m brave enough for this.
It’s not the scrapes and bruises that bother me; we celebrate them as medals of childhood.
No, it’s the scraped spirits and bruised hearts that stir me to grief… and fear.
And I confess again I just don’t think I’m brave enough for this.
Here I am. I’ve birthed my heart three times right out of my body, and now my very heart walks around, exposed.
How can I protect my precious ones without inadvertently communicating that I don’t think they can handle a situation, without tearing at their burgeoning manhood? How do I tell him it’s okay to stand up for himself without inflicting further injury by suggesting he messed up when he didn’t? How do I keep my own feelings of childhood (and womanhood) rejection from projecting onto them? How do I not completely mess up this thing called parenting? How do I not completely mess them up?
And I just don’t think I’m brave enough for this.
Do you ever feel that way? [Oh gracious, please tell me I’m not alone.]
Well let me tell you right now: there is hope.
In fact, there is a whole wellspring of hope to be found in God’s word. Here are a few of my favorite verses for when I am tempted to worry and fear:
“Come to Me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (John 14:27).
“For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace” (Romans 8:6).
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).
The simple fact of the matter is He’s got this. Whatever situation you face as you journey through motherhood, God is neither oblivious nor indifferent. He has not left us as orphans (John 14:18). His heart as a father is to nurture and train our hearts as parents.
Here’s the verse I really cling to in quaking moments like these, a verse with a promise. When I pray for my children, I always pray this: God, please give us wisdom as we raise our kids.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you” (James 1:5).
God grants peace to my spirit (a peace so surpassing that people don’t even understand it) and gives wisdom to my heart (generously).
Still think you’re not brave enough for this?
“Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).
If you’ve ever felt that you lack the bravery for motherhood, won’t you leave a comment below and share? We’re in this together!